I'm having a really hard time writing at the moment; in all honesty I am totally and completely lost, not only for words, but also in terms of which direction to go in next, and where I'm supposed to fit in amongst this jumble. I feel like a misfit - I'm no longer a student, but I'm not yet a graduate, I have a blog, but I certainly don't feel like a blogger - It's all quite disheartening and I feel like I lack direction in every part of my life. There's no 'set' path for me anymore and that's a scary thought because I don't feel ready to 'grow up', but I really don't have a choice in the matter. I can't really control what happens next in my career or with my relationships, but I can control this blog and how I interact with the blogging world, but let's get a few things clear first.

There's something about blogging recently that has really been bugging me, but due to my lack of creativity at the moment, I've been hesitant to let it out. I've been blogging for over four years now, and although it's a complete cliché to say this, things have really changed - and not necessarily for the better. I will not name names, and I don't want to come off as passive-aggressive, but this is seriously something that has really frustrated me lately, so I feel like I have to get it off my chest. This is not an isolated case either, I know that it has been happening a lot lately and I really have to say my mind. I've come across a few bloggers lately that have really made me question why I'm doing what I do - girls who blatantly ask the best way to get 'freebies', girls who complain that their X number of followers isn't good enough, girls who are, in my opinion, blogging for entirely the wrong reason and frankly, are tainting the world I used to know and love. 

I know that the majority of bloggers aren't like this, but it seems that the number who are continues to grow day by day, and it's really putting me off, and even though I've just passed my dream milestone of 1,000 followers (Thank you!!) I do often wonder what I'm even doing here when the game has completely changed. I'd be lying if the occasional moisturiser landing on your doorstep or a rush of new followers didn't sweeten the deal, but that's not why I'm here

- I'm here because life throws obstacles at us every single day. I'm honestly scared more often than not, but if I can share even one ounce of wisdom that could help the next girl trembling in line, then my fear will be worth it.

I'm here because it's an amazing way to connect with similarly minded people from all over the world and form bonds that would never have existed without this extraordinary platform. 

I'm here because I'm just an ordinary 22-year-old girl with big dreams and even bigger ambition who wants to connect with the world so that I can share my experiences and learn from others. 

I'd be a hypocrite if I denied ever pushing for more followers or refreshing the page a few times a day, but not because follows will earn me money or get me more samples, but because seeing a follower count climb means that people actually like to read what I have to say, and as a girl who never had many friends growing up, that gives me a sense of self-worth and assurance that people actually like me. I know that I shouldn't attach my self-esteem to a tiny number at the bottom of a web page, but the satisfaction you feel when somebody enjoys your content is a thousand times better than any free eyeliner, and that's what I feel a lot of 'new' bloggers are missing - pride in their work and a desire to do better. 

So where do I go from here? I'm still the same girl, but the world around me has changed and I don't know how to relate to the queen of freebies, the over-zealous tweeter, or the social media mavens. I don't want to know how to 'reach my full 'SEO' potential' or how to 'get all of the PR samples', I just want to blog and enjoy the journey. This blog has accompanied me throughout the last four years of my life; seen some of my highest and lowest points, and has seen me grown up a hell of a lot. I refuse to let the 'trendiness' of blogging ruin such a significant part of my life; now I just need to figure out how to navigate this unknown and treacherous terrain and hopefully make it out the other side by continuing to do what I do.

The question is, will you continue with me on this journey into the unknown? I really hope so.


  1. This post was really nice to read! I barely ever read bloggers who are like the ones you described, they just don´t seem real to me. I “only“ have about 100 followers, but I am grateful for every single one of them! I know that my blog is not the best quality one, but for a student, whose first language is not English, I am glad how it all looks :)


  2. This was so amazing to read because I've been feeling the same lately. I keep seeing so many bloggers talking about the best way to grow their blog follower-wise which completely misses the point of blogging. I mean getting new readers is always nice, but now it feels like if you want to be a blogger you need to blog full time, take part in Twitter chats every night and promote on social media every 2 hours or something. I think it's completely fine to promote your blog, because some bloggers blog full time and they need income, but we shouldn't ever forget that content is what actually makes up your blog not stats. Oops this turned out to be a bit ranty but just to let you know that I get what you're feeling!

    Yet Another Makeup Blog.

  3. I don't have a blog myself, so for me it is easy, I just don't read blogs like the ones you described. But I imagine how discouraging it must be for someone like you, who has been blogging for a long time, to see the whole thing changing so much. But please, don't let that stop you! I will continue with you on this journey :) I know that,
    whatever way you choose to go with your blog, you will always create
    great, honest and unique content, and your readers appreciate that a lot :)

  4. I am at such a similar point to you in my life right now Isobel. No longer a student, not yet a graduate. The sudden lack of direction from education is terrifying. I totally agree with you that blogging has suddenly become VERY business-minded and it's hard to know how to react when you don't blog for those reasons and cannot relate to those who do. I feel blogging is cheapened by such behaviour. But, there are so many of us here for the RIGHT reasons and we will weather the storm. Friendships made through blogging are some of my most cherished. Just keep on keeping on, I'll still be here with you on your blogging journey no matter what! :)
    Rebecca | The Two Twenty Somethings

  5. A very interesting post, it is a shame that other people have made you feel like this about your blog. I always find your posts very interesting and I will continue to read your blog no matter what happens.
    Take care and all the best.

  6. This was a really excellent read, and something I'm sure many other people (bloggers or not) can relate to, I definitely understand what you mean about the current trend in blogging. It's very easy to feel disillusioned by the whole business, but I just remind myself that I'm really doing this for me and my own enjoyment as much as everyone else!

    Tessa at Bramble & Thorn

  7. This was great to read and I definitely agree with everything you said! It's so important to remind yourself of why you're doing it, because at the end of the day that's all that matters. x


  8. Thanks Victoria! I know what you mean - I'd rather stay at the same follower count and still have all of the lovely regular commenters rather than 10,000 people who never interacted with me! x

  9. Thank you for your continuous support Kelly x

  10. Hehe thanks Tasha! Let's bring back the way blogging used to be! x

  11. I couldn't agree more! I have no idea who has enough time to come up with all of these different twitter chats, never mind participate in them all! If you have time for that then maybe you should find a new hobby! x

  12. Thanks Irene - I'll continue to do what I do and hopefully that will be the best for us all! x

  13. 1) I don't think anyone knows what the next step in their life is--hell, I'm half-assing this as I go along. WHAT IS FINANCIAL SECURITY?? BRB, GONNA GO BACK TO SCHOOL AND GET 50 DEGREES (but seriously, curse my lack of dreams and ambition)

    2) I'm not on my blog twitter account enough to witness this influx of bloggers taking advantage of their positions and requesting free stuff, but eh, to each their own. I suppose it does reflect badly on us as a collective though, but at the same time, I guess some people feel it helps their blog grow by reviewing more stuff? IDEK. But yeah, I'm not on board with the whole "grow ur blog" sht either. I'll just keep on doing me, thx.

  14. Wait holy shit this was posted a month ago?

    /Well then.../ (I'M JUST FACING BACKLOG OK)